Stars : Sikki Nixx, April Rayne, Madison, KC Williams, Angela
Summers,
Jamie Leigh, Mercedes Lynn, Chris Stock, TT Boy.
VIDEO TEAM/PAUL NORMAN PROD's.
Yes folks, it's yet another Paul Norman movie with yet more prosthetic sex. I would really like to know if there is a market out there for
this sort of thing. If there really are people who get turned on by a guy with foam dildoes on each hand (Or a guy with a dildo on his nose in the case of "Cyrano" ). To be fair, there is a balance between the prosthetic sex and the real sex in this movie, unlike in "Cyrano" or the abysmal "Penishands 3" where the fake stuff drastically outweighs the real thing. Thus, the film isn't as bad as it could be...
Just in case you don't already know, I'd better explain the
"Penishands" saga briefly, so no-one gets confused. Edward Penishands is an innocent,
well-meaning individual shunned by society because of the huge penises
that he has on the end of his arms instead of hands. He lived in a
big castle out in the middle of nowhere until (in part one) he was
rescued by dildo saleswoman, Alexandria Quinn. She took him back to
her house, where he met and fell in love with her daughter played by
Jeanna Fine. Having found true love, Edward now felt his life complete.
However, things have not been going too well since the end of that one...
This film opens with shots of the gothic castle (a painting, BTW) in
a thunder storm as swirly string music plays in the background. Inside
the castle, Edward (played by Sikki Nixx) sits in a pile of junk and
looks very upset. We are told in voiceover that his true love had to
leave him to go to Europe or something, but she would return in a year's
time. It's now six months later and Edward is on the verge of cracking
up. Cut to the outside of the castle, where April Rayne is making her
way through the rain shouting "Edward! Edward! Is that you!?".
Eventually, she locates him, sitting in the corner, and introduces
herself as a top class Hollywood agent. She lifts him up and drags him
off to her place...
Gone now are the nice gothic set pieces as we now venture into the
tres' tacky "Porno apartment" (TM). She sits him down on the couch,
tells him how he's destined to be a big Hollywood star, then brings
out a duster to clean him up. Obviously, all this rubbing on the
Penishands turns him on, so they decide to screw. It begins with some
ludicrous sucking on the dildoes during which both partners express
"how good it feels" (!) numerous times. Very silly. Then she sits on
his face for awhile, before eventually breaking into the trademarked
Penishands screw. This is where she lies down on the couch, he
penetrates her with one of the Penishands while the other one just
kind of rests on her stomach. Not very erotic at all. After several
hours... erm I mean minutes... of this nonsense, she asks him "Haven't
you got something else you want to show me, Edward?" and he finally
pulls out his real appendage for a straightforward missionary then
doggie screw, before finishing with a bit more mish and sending a
cum shot flying from her crotch to her neck. Then it's time for his
hands to cum, too, so we get a very silly sequence where she rubs
his hands, he makes stupid facial expressions, then finally in a
plethora of "OH MY GOD!"'s he shoots ridiculous loads of fake semen
from the ends of the dildoes. Does anybody actually find things like
that erotic? I know I don't.
Now we cut to another tacky porno apartment where Mercedes Lynn and
some wimp who I haven't seen before (Chris Stock, going by the credits)
sit around talking about Edward. It turns out that April is also
Mercedes' agent and Mercedes is not getting any work now that April's
devoting all her time to Edward. Desperately wanting to crush Edward's
potentially successful acting career (yeah, right) in it's early days,
Mercedes hatches an evil plan, but before she can tell it, she decides
to screw Chris. This starts with some brief fellatio. Very standard
with more use of her hands than her mouth. After this we get some
cunnilingus, where she stands above him and he kneels below her
crotch, moving his tongue about. We get some full-body shots of
Mercedes here, but I'm not much of a fan so they're wasted on me, I'm
afraid. Moving swiftly along, now, we get the average mish/doggie
screw, devoid of passion or heat, ending with a pop shot on her butt,
which drips down a bit between her legs. Yawn.
Her plan, it seems, is to hook up Edward with a pair of sex-crazed
cocaine junkies (played by Angela Summers and Jamie Leigh) who will
act as a bad influence on him. Thus, she invites him to a party. He
arrives at the door, where he is greeted by Angela and Jamie, and
they take him into the lounge. First, they get him drunk then they
decide to fuck him. Technically speaking, this is just a g/g scene
as Edward never unveils his real penis and the girls are just playing
with dildoes, but there is no actual g/g interraction going on here.
Hmmm.. So really it's just two side-by-side solo-scenes?? Then how
does this explain the cumshot? Errr... Well, anyway, first he lets
Jamie suck on one of the hands for a long while as he rubs the other
one up and down between Angela's breasts. Then they move over to the
couch, where the two girls lie down and he penetrates both of them
at once, giving them a Penishand each. Angela looks very pretty here,
BTW, with small breasts and straight hair, but Jamie has certainly
seen better days. This goes on for a bit, before we get Jamie's wild
throes of passion (!). She fakes a very intense orgasm and starts
screaming and flailing about like nobody's business. It's quite
funny to watch the look on Angela's face as this is happening. It's
a kind of "What the fuck?" look! Not to be outdone, Angela attempts
to fake an orgasm, but obviously has a lower embarassment threshold
to Jamie, therefore merely screams a bit and then calms down. After
all this, it's Ed's turn and he blasts a gallon of fake cum across
each girl's chest. Following the cumshots, they sit him down on the
couch and force him into snorting coke until the screen goes blurry...
Next, we are treated to an amusing sequence detailing the downfall
of Edward Penishands. As he is thrust further and further into a
non-stop lifestyle of sex and drugs with Angela and Jamie, his film
career comes to a standstill and the papers label him a no-hoper
and a junkie. April quits being his agent and sends him packing,
he starts wearing sunglasses and stupid shirts (obviously these are
the side-effects of cocaine, kids) and eventually is seen punching
a fan in public (The ultimate Hollywood crime). His career is over.
All he has left now are Angela and Jamie, who only love him for his
hands (Oh it's so sad!). Alas, even this can't last long. All the
cocaine has made him impotent and in a truly shattering sequence
(with violins playing in the background) he lifts up his Penishands,
only to find... They've gone limp. He collapses in a heap and we
fade to black.
Cut now to a few months down the line in a park of some kind, where
Edward is employed to pick up litter. Sitting at a picnic table are
two young lovers (played by TT Boy and KC Williams) who start to
comment on him. She expresses sympathy for such a pathetic creature
and they want to help him out. However as he gets closer to them,
they notice his hands. ("OH MY GOD!" she shouts, "It's Penishands!!")
TT gets mad and threatens to call the police and have Ed arrested for
indecent exposure, so Ed runs off, leaving TT and KC to screw (for no
reason) on the picnic table. I would say this is outdoor sex, but
we never actually see the sun and the table in the same shot so it
could be faked. But it's a watchable scene nonetheless with KC looking
fairly attractive, despite only putting in an average performance.
She begins with some poorly executed fellatio (more of the handjob
with tongue-work style) then lies on the table for a bit of cunnilingus.
Soon they move into a missionary screw on the table, before she
crawls naked across the surface (nice full body shots) and sets herself
up for some doggie-screwing, shot from strange angles. Then he lies
down on the table for some cowgirl (not reverse-cowgirl) before he
eventually sends an nearly-invisible cumshot flying across her spine.
Back at the castle, Edward is sitting in the corner, shaking and
looking
very upset indeed. He rips his calender off the wall in a fit of rage
and then curls up into a foetal position. Just then, we hear someone
yelling "Edward? Is that you?" and Madison walks in. She introduces
herself as being a friend of Edward's true love and has been asked to
look after him until she finally returns. Madison notices that Ed's
hands have gone limp and suggests that maybe she should do something
about that. She rubs the hands up and down for awhile and eventually
(to the sound of booming orchesta music) gets them hard. A smile
floods across Ed's face and he begins to give her cunnilingus. Now,
here I was expecting another lame Penishands screw, but amazingly,
they don't get used AT ALL (!!) in this scene. Instead we have a
fairly hot, well shot standing screw with Madison and Edward. After
the cunnilingus, she takes out Ed's member and starts sucking him
off, briefly, before breaking into the screw. The atmosphere is quite
dark here, the sets are gothic and Madison does a lot of talking. All
these factors add up to make quite a nice scene. They continue in
the standing-position for awhile before finishing off with some
standing-doggie leading up to a powerful cumshot across her back
which could have been better placed, I'll admit. The final shot has
the two of them kissing and Ed looking wide-eyed into the camera,
as the swirling string music starts up again.... THE END.
Hmmmm... An okay movie with a 3:2 ratio of real sex to prosthetic sex,
but really this is just a standard sex flick. The last scene was fairly
good, and the Angela Summers and KC Williams scenes were watchable, so
I guess that the sex wasn't all that bad. The plot was amusing in parts
although the acting was poor all round. Overall, I'll give this a
strictly average 2.35 on the Imperial Scale and recommend it to
lovers
of prosthetic sex or major fans of any of the actresses involved.
Happy viewing!
Back to Index
Created: Sunday, February 18, 1996 - 10:26:30 PM
Last Updated:
Visitor:
169 “I can arrange all that.” Such Apaches as had not gone back on the war-path returned to the States with the troops; but there were five months more of the outrages of Geronimo and his kind. Then in the summer of the year another man, more fortunate and better fitted to deal with it all, perhaps,—with the tangle of lies and deceptions, cross purposes and trickery,—succeeded where Crook had failed and had been relieved of a task that was beyond him. Geronimo was captured, and was hurried off to a Florida prison with his band, as far as they well could be from the reservation they had refused to accept. And with them were sent other Indians, who had been the friends and helpers of the government for years, and who had run great risks to help or to obtain peace. But the memory and gratitude of governments is become a proverb. The southwest settled down to enjoy its safety. The troops rested upon the laurels they had won, the superseded general went on with his work in another field far away to the north. The new general, the saviour of the land, was heaped[Pg 305] with honor and praise, and the path of civilization was laid clear. Parliament met on the 10th of January, 1765. The resentment of the Americans had reached the ears of the Ministry and the king, yet both continued determined to proceed. In the interviews which Franklin and the other agents had with the Ministers, Grenville begged them to point to any other tax that would be more agreeable to the colonists than the stamp-duty; but they without any real legal grounds drew the line between levying custom and imposing an inland tax. Grenville paid no attention to these representations. Fifty-five resolutions, prepared by a committee of ways and means, were laid by him on the table of the House of Commons at an early day of the Session, imposing on America nearly the same stamp-duties as were already in practical operation in England. These resolutions being adopted, were embodied in a bill; and when it was introduced to the House, it was received with an apathy which betrayed on all hands the profoundest ignorance of its importance. Burke, who was a spectator of the debates in both Houses, in a speech some years afterwards, stated that he never heard a more languid debate than that in the Commons. Only two or three persons spoke against the measure and that with great composure. There was but one division in the whole progress of the Bill, and the minority did not reach to more than thirty-nine or forty. In the Lords, he said, there was, to the best of his recollection, neither division nor debate! His cheek paled for an instant as the thought obtruded that the man might resist and he have to really shoot him. "Good, the old man's goin' to take the grub out to 'em himself," thought the Deacon with relief. "He'll be easy to manage. No need o' shootin' him." "Them that we shot?" said Shorty carelessly, feeling around for his tobacco to refill his pipe. "Nothin'. I guess we've done enough for 'em already." John Dodd, twenty-seven years old, master, part of the third generation, arranged his chair carefully so that it faced the door of the Commons Room, letting the light from the great window illumine the back of his head. He clasped his hands in his lap in a single, nervous gesture, never noticing that the light gave him a faint saintlike halo about his feathery hair. His companion took another chair, set it at right angles to Dodd's and gave it long and thoughtful consideration, as if the act of sitting down were something new and untried. "Besides," Norma said desperately, "they're only rumors—" "Oh, I've found a way of gitting shut of them rootses—thought of it while I wur working at the trees. I'm going to blast 'em out." During the next ten years the farm went forward by strides. Reuben bought seven more acres of Boarzell in '59, and fourteen in '60. He also bought a horse-rake, and threshed by machinery. He was now a topic in every public-house from Northiam to Rye. His success and the scant trouble he took to conciliate those about him had made him disliked. Unprosperous farmers[Pg 124] spoke windily of "spoiling his liddle game." Ditch and Ginner even suggested to Vennal that they should club together and buy thirty acres or so of the Moor themselves, just to spite him. However, money was too precious to throw away even on such an object, especially as everyone felt sure that Backfield would sooner or later "bust himself" in his dealings with Boarzell. "Let's go home," she said faintly—"it's getting late." HoME干别人老婆嗯啊小说
ENTER NUMBET 0017 daoju4.net.cn www.xudu9.com.cn daoba7.net.cn www.8xue8.com.cn www.jinqi9.net.cn cdtong.com.cn www.zyzrny.com.cn www.06vc.com.cn www.71n9t.com.cn 4970.com.cn