From: hn (HN)
Subject: Review of "Bloopers"
Date: Mon, 04 Aug 97 04:53:20
Organization: None
"Bloopers"
Released by Video Team, 1994, approx. 1 hr. 15 min., directed by Wes
Emerson.
This vid features lots of outtakes from adult vids and has 3 complete
sex scenes. It's hosted by P.J. Sparxx and Jonathan Morgan. The two
present the bloopers in segments pertaining to the qualities necessary
to make it as a porn performer. I'm not a fan of either of them so I
found them both pretty distracting and FF thru a lot of their banter.
The segments and their respective highlights are as follows:
"Ability to Take Direction"
Steven St. Croix and a crewperson are wiping of PJ's bare feet. This
made me think of the segment on pornstars and shoes from the FAQ.
Amber Lynn is told to take off her shoes (because they make too much
noise) and she says, "Get fucked!"
"Enthusiasm"
Shots of performers making exaggerated faces for the cumshot.
One messy and nasty double facial on Crystal Wilder who spits it out
(blech!)
"Creativity"
An actress unexpectedly begins lactating and decides to get it on tape
(she's doing g/g and the other actress reels back, fearing she'll get
an squirted in the eye).
Probably the funniest scene on the tape, Mike Horner is totally
flaccid and is pretending to fuck Tiffany Million doggy. When they
switch to standing side saddle, Mike is faux pumping furiously and you
can see his flaccid willy flopping around. One of the crew yells,
"Bad penis! Bad penis!" while the 2 performers crack up. They then
show the complete scene as it was on the final video.
"Memory & Diction"
Lots of scenes w/ performers forgetting lines and giggling. Those I
recognized were Peter North, Alex Jordan, Chris Newz, Tom Byron, PJ
Sparxx, and Mike Horner.
They then show a complete scene w/ PJ, Mike, and some guy I didn't
recognize. It takes place in a locker and seems to involve PJ getting
something extra w/ her tennis lessons.
"Stamina"
An actress tells the director she can't take any more anal (in mish)
and the director complies by stopping the scene.
Male performers popping too soon, popping zilch, and not being able to
get it up.
"Grace and Agility"
They show Peter North popping one of his usual huge loads on a girl's
butt while in cowgirl; all you see is the girl's ass and the huge load
and one of the crew mutters, "All right! I want this guy's address,
phone no., and...!"
PJ and another girl tumble off a chair while PJ is trying to stick one
of her boobs into the girl's butthole.
Deidre Holland and Flame are in a 69 and Deidre (who's on the bottom)
starts to spit. She smiles and says, "Got some hair on my tongue" to
which Flame giggles, "I've got a lot down there."
They then show the complete lez scene between these two ladies.
The tape ends w/ outtakes from the hosting by PJ and Morgan. It
starts off w/ Morgan's usual wisecracks and smug comments and
degenerates into arguing--Morgan says to her, "I loathe you w/ every
fiber of my body" and PJ smacks him at least 7 times (I stopped
counting).
I didn't mention a lot of the outtakes since they were real brief. I
couldn't identify any of the titles the outtakes were from and they
weren't listed; I also couldn't identify a lot of the performers but
you can find this info. at least at the DB. If you cut out the sex
scenes (which really aren't worth seeing unless you're a diehard fan
of the performers in'em) and the banter between PJ and Morgan, the
bloopers were probably around 45 min. I posted a review of another
blooper tape, "Boobs, Butts, and Bloopers" that's 15 min. shorter in
running time but has more actual outtakes.
Created: August 05, 1997 -- 12:20 AM
Last Updated:
Visitor:
169 “I can arrange all that.” Such Apaches as had not gone back on the war-path returned to the States with the troops; but there were five months more of the outrages of Geronimo and his kind. Then in the summer of the year another man, more fortunate and better fitted to deal with it all, perhaps,—with the tangle of lies and deceptions, cross purposes and trickery,—succeeded where Crook had failed and had been relieved of a task that was beyond him. Geronimo was captured, and was hurried off to a Florida prison with his band, as far as they well could be from the reservation they had refused to accept. And with them were sent other Indians, who had been the friends and helpers of the government for years, and who had run great risks to help or to obtain peace. But the memory and gratitude of governments is become a proverb. The southwest settled down to enjoy its safety. The troops rested upon the laurels they had won, the superseded general went on with his work in another field far away to the north. The new general, the saviour of the land, was heaped[Pg 305] with honor and praise, and the path of civilization was laid clear. Parliament met on the 10th of January, 1765. The resentment of the Americans had reached the ears of the Ministry and the king, yet both continued determined to proceed. In the interviews which Franklin and the other agents had with the Ministers, Grenville begged them to point to any other tax that would be more agreeable to the colonists than the stamp-duty; but they without any real legal grounds drew the line between levying custom and imposing an inland tax. Grenville paid no attention to these representations. Fifty-five resolutions, prepared by a committee of ways and means, were laid by him on the table of the House of Commons at an early day of the Session, imposing on America nearly the same stamp-duties as were already in practical operation in England. These resolutions being adopted, were embodied in a bill; and when it was introduced to the House, it was received with an apathy which betrayed on all hands the profoundest ignorance of its importance. Burke, who was a spectator of the debates in both Houses, in a speech some years afterwards, stated that he never heard a more languid debate than that in the Commons. Only two or three persons spoke against the measure and that with great composure. There was but one division in the whole progress of the Bill, and the minority did not reach to more than thirty-nine or forty. In the Lords, he said, there was, to the best of his recollection, neither division nor debate! His cheek paled for an instant as the thought obtruded that the man might resist and he have to really shoot him. "Good, the old man's goin' to take the grub out to 'em himself," thought the Deacon with relief. "He'll be easy to manage. No need o' shootin' him." "Them that we shot?" said Shorty carelessly, feeling around for his tobacco to refill his pipe. "Nothin'. I guess we've done enough for 'em already." John Dodd, twenty-seven years old, master, part of the third generation, arranged his chair carefully so that it faced the door of the Commons Room, letting the light from the great window illumine the back of his head. He clasped his hands in his lap in a single, nervous gesture, never noticing that the light gave him a faint saintlike halo about his feathery hair. His companion took another chair, set it at right angles to Dodd's and gave it long and thoughtful consideration, as if the act of sitting down were something new and untried. "Besides," Norma said desperately, "they're only rumors—" "Oh, I've found a way of gitting shut of them rootses—thought of it while I wur working at the trees. I'm going to blast 'em out." During the next ten years the farm went forward by strides. Reuben bought seven more acres of Boarzell in '59, and fourteen in '60. He also bought a horse-rake, and threshed by machinery. He was now a topic in every public-house from Northiam to Rye. His success and the scant trouble he took to conciliate those about him had made him disliked. Unprosperous farmers[Pg 124] spoke windily of "spoiling his liddle game." Ditch and Ginner even suggested to Vennal that they should club together and buy thirty acres or so of the Moor themselves, just to spite him. However, money was too precious to throw away even on such an object, especially as everyone felt sure that Backfield would sooner or later "bust himself" in his dealings with Boarzell. "Let's go home," she said faintly—"it's getting late." HoME干别人老婆嗯啊小说
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