From [email protected] Sun Mar 19 10:36:00 EST 1995
Article: 52747 of alt.sex.movies
From: [email protected] (George Shaffer)
Newsgroups: alt.sex.movies
Subject: The Opening of Misty Beethoven (review)
Date: 19 Mar 1995 15:20:33 GMT
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The Opening of Misty Beethoven is mentioned from time to time in
a.s.m. Recently someone said they had just seen it and were quite
disappointed because they had seen a cut version. I suspect that
Misty is so tame by today's standards that the viewer assumed that
it must have been cut. I saw Misty in a theater (twice) when it was
released in the mid 70's. About 1985 I got an uncut video that runs
86 minutes. Misty was directed by Henry Paris and starred Constance
Money, Jamie Gillis, Jacqueline Beudant. Terri Hal, Ras King,
Gloria Leonard and several other names were listed in the credits.
The Opening of Misty Beethoven is clearly an adult movie but it is
distinctly different and it was just as different when it came out.
It may be the only adult movie where the story is more important
than the sex. It was a big budget movie with many scenes in quite
a variety of locations and with many extras. There is some genuine
humor in the dialogue. The acting is as good as it gets in an adult
movie.
Jamie Gillis is a sex doctor/author who finds Constance Money in a
Paris theater. She is low class hooker who says "Listen, I do a
straight fuck, I don't take it the mouth, I don't take in the ass."
J.G. describes her as the "absolute nadir of passion, the most
unexciting thing God has ever created, a sexual civil service
worker." The story is about the challenge of turning C.M. into an
erotic sensation so she can become the next "Goldenrod Girl".
There are only four sex scenes that are five minutes or longer but
there are dozens of short vignettes, mostly blowjobs (with some very
mild facials) and pussy licking but also some novelties. In one, an
airline stewardess raises her skirt to expose her bare ass. A male
passenger inserts an aluminum cigar tube into her ass and the
stewardess then walks away. The passenger's companion asks why he
did that and he responds to smuggle a cigar past customs. The
companion says that's not illegal and the passenger replies "but she
doesn't know that." Misty has many surprising little twists.
Most of Misty's training takes place at an ultra-modern New York
apartment and a lavish French chateau. In both locations there are
numerous shots of servants engaging in a variety of sexual
activities and servicing their employers. These sexual vignettes
are not the focus of the scene but simply background. Frequently
while Jamie rambles on about various sex related topics, a female
servant is sucking his dick. In most of these shots the
participants are largely or fully clothed with only a fly unzipped
or a skirt pulled up.
The first extended sex scene with nudity is almost halfway into
Misty. It starts with a brunette fondling then eating Jacqueline
Beudant's pussy while Jamie watches as servants give him a blowjob.
This is followed by brunette sucking then fucking Jamie (both naked)
in several positions including RC. There is no question that there
is penetration but between the lighting, poor angles (except RC) and
pubic hair you really don't see much. The scene ends with Jamie
cumming on the brunette's belly. This is part of Misty's training
and there is a good bit of sexy talk.
In the next scene Misty puts her lesson to use when she seduces a
gay male art gallery owner when they are trapped in his gallery
after the lights turned off. There is a fair amount of foreplay and
then Misty blows and fucks the gallery owner. She is cowgirl and
this the first clear, properly lit penetration shot. He is wearing
an open robe but she never removes her sweater. He cums on is own
belly.
Following this and other of Misty's triumphs, there are captured
"man on the street" conversations suggesting that Misty is the talk
of the town. These are typically mixed with more training scenes.
The next major scene is at a party and is a three way with
Constance, Gloria Leonard and Ras King (?). Gloria licks C.M.s cunt
and then they switch. Both are fully clothed with only raised
skirts. R.K. joins in and all get naked in a tumble of body parts.
C.M. puts on a dildo in a harness and then while G.L. blows R.K.,
C.M. lubes his ass. Then C.M. mounts R.K. from behind while he
screws G.L. who is now on her back. The dildo penetration is shown
but the angle is poor. There are no cum shots of any kind in this
scene. Following this there is a very brief four way with J.G.,
J.B. and others with no detail shown.
In the final sex scene of any duration, J.G. in on top of C.M. and
there is the fourth (first was brief in an early scene) and final
penetration shot (from a so-so angle). C.M. sits up and they
continue face to face and there are more poorly lit close ups and
confused body part shots. J.G. eats C.M. and sucks her nipples. At
the end of the scene, cum drips off the screen and only the crew
knows where it landed.
Do I recommend this movie? Definitely not if you want lots of hot
sex. I had not seen if for several years and did not get aroused
watching it this time. There really isn't much more sex than I have
described. On the other hand there is enough story and humor and
the acting is good enough you may be able to convince yourself or
someone else that you are watching this for other than the sake of
watching sex. This may be a useful transition movie. If your
partner isn't ready to watch sex for sex's sake this may help get
them there and the scenes with Misty overcoming her aversion to
oral sex may also be useful. The Opening of Misty Beethoven ran
continuously for more than a year at the movie theater where I saw
it so it obviously had an appeal that no other adult movie of its
time (or since?) could match but its not the appeal of raw sex.
169 “I can arrange all that.” Such Apaches as had not gone back on the war-path returned to the States with the troops; but there were five months more of the outrages of Geronimo and his kind. Then in the summer of the year another man, more fortunate and better fitted to deal with it all, perhaps,—with the tangle of lies and deceptions, cross purposes and trickery,—succeeded where Crook had failed and had been relieved of a task that was beyond him. Geronimo was captured, and was hurried off to a Florida prison with his band, as far as they well could be from the reservation they had refused to accept. And with them were sent other Indians, who had been the friends and helpers of the government for years, and who had run great risks to help or to obtain peace. But the memory and gratitude of governments is become a proverb. The southwest settled down to enjoy its safety. The troops rested upon the laurels they had won, the superseded general went on with his work in another field far away to the north. The new general, the saviour of the land, was heaped[Pg 305] with honor and praise, and the path of civilization was laid clear. Parliament met on the 10th of January, 1765. The resentment of the Americans had reached the ears of the Ministry and the king, yet both continued determined to proceed. In the interviews which Franklin and the other agents had with the Ministers, Grenville begged them to point to any other tax that would be more agreeable to the colonists than the stamp-duty; but they without any real legal grounds drew the line between levying custom and imposing an inland tax. Grenville paid no attention to these representations. Fifty-five resolutions, prepared by a committee of ways and means, were laid by him on the table of the House of Commons at an early day of the Session, imposing on America nearly the same stamp-duties as were already in practical operation in England. These resolutions being adopted, were embodied in a bill; and when it was introduced to the House, it was received with an apathy which betrayed on all hands the profoundest ignorance of its importance. Burke, who was a spectator of the debates in both Houses, in a speech some years afterwards, stated that he never heard a more languid debate than that in the Commons. Only two or three persons spoke against the measure and that with great composure. There was but one division in the whole progress of the Bill, and the minority did not reach to more than thirty-nine or forty. In the Lords, he said, there was, to the best of his recollection, neither division nor debate! His cheek paled for an instant as the thought obtruded that the man might resist and he have to really shoot him. "Good, the old man's goin' to take the grub out to 'em himself," thought the Deacon with relief. "He'll be easy to manage. No need o' shootin' him." "Them that we shot?" said Shorty carelessly, feeling around for his tobacco to refill his pipe. "Nothin'. I guess we've done enough for 'em already." John Dodd, twenty-seven years old, master, part of the third generation, arranged his chair carefully so that it faced the door of the Commons Room, letting the light from the great window illumine the back of his head. He clasped his hands in his lap in a single, nervous gesture, never noticing that the light gave him a faint saintlike halo about his feathery hair. His companion took another chair, set it at right angles to Dodd's and gave it long and thoughtful consideration, as if the act of sitting down were something new and untried. "Besides," Norma said desperately, "they're only rumors—" "Oh, I've found a way of gitting shut of them rootses—thought of it while I wur working at the trees. I'm going to blast 'em out." During the next ten years the farm went forward by strides. Reuben bought seven more acres of Boarzell in '59, and fourteen in '60. He also bought a horse-rake, and threshed by machinery. He was now a topic in every public-house from Northiam to Rye. His success and the scant trouble he took to conciliate those about him had made him disliked. Unprosperous farmers[Pg 124] spoke windily of "spoiling his liddle game." Ditch and Ginner even suggested to Vennal that they should club together and buy thirty acres or so of the Moor themselves, just to spite him. However, money was too precious to throw away even on such an object, especially as everyone felt sure that Backfield would sooner or later "bust himself" in his dealings with Boarzell. "Let's go home," she said faintly—"it's getting late."